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Riddle:
Three American military veterans: Ron(Army), Terry(Army), and Ron(Marines) retired from their military careers and decided to go into business together. Using all of their engineering knowledge and expertise, the three veterans have revamped an idea for an old device, made many improvements to it, and are now trying to patent it under the name: The Ron - Terry - Ron device, or (R.T.R). They advertise it by saying, "The R.T.R is designed only for those who want to move forward in life, but never backward. It is guaranteed to get your heart pumping, your blood pressure rising, and your armpits sweating"(classy advertising by these veterans). The advertising continues: "The R.T.R. is for the person who tries to move ahead, but always ends up exactly where they started." The only problem with the R.T.R device is, to use one, you will have to ignore the Gadsden flag(i.e., the one with the coiled rattlesnake pictured on it) and its famous motto. Forrest Gump would be very proud of these veterans. Just exactly what is the Ron - Terry - Ron (R.T.R.) device, and why must the Gadsden flag motto be ignored by its users?
Answer: The three veterans have made some innovative improvements to a basic Treadmill design, and are trying to patent these improvements in the hope of selling their newly created device. Of course, these veterans realize that anyone who uses their new product will be violating the early Continental Marine message and motto of the famous Gadsden flag which states, "Don't Tread on Me". Just as Forrest Gump was encouraged to "Run - Forrest - Run", we wish success to these three veterans with the words, "Ron - Terry - Ron".
Riddle:
I talk, but I do not speak my mind I hear words, but I do not listen to thoughts When I wake, all see me When I sleep, all hear me Many heads are on my shoulders Many hands are at my feet The strongest steel cannot break my visage But the softest whisper can destroy me The quietest whimper can be heard. What am I?
Riddle:
Two men and two women, all carrying loaded shotguns, drove to a field where they planned to shoot as many birds as possible. The four had absolutely no desire to eat any of the birds they were planning to shoot, and they brought no dogs to retrieve any they happened to hit. Each of the four people in turn would loudly shout a one-word command, and when a bird would fly out in front of them, they would shoot to destroy it. When they were finished, the bodies of 99 birds lay mutilated in the field, as only one bird had escaped their deadly shooting skills. The two men and two women cheerfully exchanged high-fives, and congratulated each other on their excellent hour of destruction. Several onlookers, who happened to witness the onslaught, gave the four a loud round of applause for the entertainment. Why did no one report this incident to the authorities, and why was there such a calloused attitude toward the shooting of these defenseless birds?
Answer: The birds the four were shooting at were pigeons ——— clay pigeons. The four were at a public shooting range, and when each of them yelled “pull”, a clay pigeon was catapulted into the air for their target practice.
Riddle:
An old man with a long, white, scraggly beard, dressed in old, dirty blue jeans, innocently approaches a group of females and takes a seat next to one of them. After saying a few words of greeting to her, he suddenly reaches out and grabs hold of her private parts, and begins pulling at her repeatedly. Surprisingly, the female shows no objection to this aggressive action by the man, and even feels relieved by his actions. Even more surprising, is the fact that all of the other females present in the group seem undisturbed by the incident. This is not a house of ill repute, and the man offers no money or other gifts to the female. But the man doesn't stop there, as he systematically moves to each of the other females in turn, and repeats the same sordid actions to each of them. Where is the outrage? Why isn't this man behind bars, instead of being allowed to molest females? And why aren't the other females objecting to the man's advances? Or perhaps, this situation isn't as bad as it appears. What exactly is going on here?
Answer: The man is a farmer who is milking his cows.
Riddle:
A man is sitting in a room along with a group of mostly women. The man suddenly begins shouting out a list of letters and numbers, alternating between the two, (e.g., letter - number - letter - number - letter - number, etc.). This goes on for some time, with the man shouting, and those in attendance remaining silent. Eventually however, one of the women in the room shouts a one word response to the man, which causes some in the room to feel disappointment, while the woman who shouts out, feels happiness. What is happening here?
Answer: The man is calling a Bingo Game for a group of mostly women. The woman who shouts out says, "Bingo!", and feels happy, while the rest of the people feel disappointment.