Phil Jones

Riddle Count: 144
Riddle: An old man with a long, white, scraggly beard, dressed in old, dirty blue jeans, innocently approaches a group of females and takes a seat next to one of them. After saying a few words of greeting to her, he suddenly reaches out and grabs hold of her private parts, and begins pulling at her repeatedly. Surprisingly, the female shows no objection to this aggressive action by the man, and even feels relieved by his actions. Even more surprising, is the fact that all of the other females present in the group seem undisturbed by the incident. This is not a house of ill repute, and the man offers no money or other gifts to the female. But the man doesn't stop there, as he systematically moves to each of the other females in turn, and repeats the same sordid actions to each of them. Where is the outrage? Why isn't this man behind bars, instead of being allowed to molest females? And why aren't the other females objecting to the man's advances? Or perhaps, this situation isn't as bad as it appears. What exactly is going on here?
Answer: The man is a farmer who is milking his cows.
A Pervert at Large??? Riddle Meme.
A Pervert at Large??? Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.
Riddle: A man is sitting in a room along with a group of mostly women. The man suddenly begins shouting out a list of letters and numbers, alternating between the two, (e.g., letter - number - letter - number - letter - number, etc.). This goes on for some time, with the man shouting, and those in attendance remaining silent. Eventually however, one of the women in the room shouts a one word response to the man, which causes some in the room to feel disappointment, while the woman who shouts out, feels happiness. What is happening here?
Answer: The man is calling a Bingo Game for a group of mostly women. The woman who shouts out says, "Bingo!", and feels happy, while the rest of the people feel disappointment.
Strange Happenings Riddle Meme.
Strange Happenings Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.
Riddle: A young sailor boy from Chicago by the name of Jack, and his little Jack Russel terrier named Bingo, stood guard over a well-known treasure for 100 years, but neither Jack nor his dog ever experienced any kind of aging during that time. Perhaps the secret of Jack and Bingo's miraculous defiance of the aging process can best be explained by revealing Jack's famous motto: "The more you eat, the more you want." What is this famous treasure Jack and Bingo guarded for 100 years, and how did they manage to defy the aging process?
Answer: Young Sailor Jack and his little Jack Russel terrier have adorned every box of Cracker Jack that contained a hidden treasure (a prize) from 1916 until 2016. The company stopped putting little material prizes in each box in 2016, much to the chagrin of baseball fans everywhere.
1916 - 2016 Riddle Meme.
1916 - 2016 Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.
Riddle: If someone were to write a biography about us, the following could be reported: #1 - Some people claim we can cure hiccups. #2 - If you are down and a little blue, you might be experiencing me. #3 - The four of us are hidden from view and are waiting for you --- underneath your car. #4 - E.C.T., not etc., has this frightening therapeutic nickname. #5 - Not trying to sound corny, but we are often seen at farmer's markets, roadside stands, and garden centers, especially in the Fall. Based on the biographical information above --- Who/what are we?
Answer: We are shock/shocks.
#4 - The Biography of ??? Riddle Meme.
#4 - The Biography of ??? Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.
Riddle: If someone were to write a biography about us, the following could be reported: #1 - A golfer faces many of us when playing 18 holes. #2 - we are frequently served with fish. #3 - On T. V., from 1977 to 1983, we enforced the law --- but only in California. #4 - Some of us have ridges, but we are not associated with mountain ranges. #5 - Gamblers love getting their hands on us as often as possible. Based on the biographical information above --- Who/what are we?
Answer: The biography of Chips.
#5 - The Biography of ??? Riddle Meme.
#5 - The Biography of ??? Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.
Riddle: A senior citizen, Marge recently made financial arrangements for a young, bald-headed man to come to her house, as she needed some assistance with some of her cleaning chores, including mopping the floors and general surface cleaning. However, despite her best efforts, Marge has been unable to convince the man to do any work for her. He just stands there with a constant smile plastered on his face, with his arms crossed, and his gold earring dangling from his left ear, as he watches Marge do all of her house cleaning -- but he never lifts one finger to help her! How long will Marge put up with this freeloader? After all, Marge has paid good money to get this man to come to her home to help her, but she ends up doing all the work! Where are the senior advocates? Just what exactly is going on here, and why is Marge allowing this situation to continue?
Answer: Marge’s helper, which she purchased at a local grocery store, is a bottle of Mr. Clean, floor and surface cleaner.
Taken to the Cleaners? Riddle Meme.
Taken to the Cleaners? Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.
Riddle: A wife called to her husband from the front door of their home stating, "Don't forget to raise the flag, but please don't be goofy and salute it afterward." Her husband responded by saying, "Don't you love your country?" The wife replied, "I am very patriotic, but I would never salute that flag. You embarrass yourself when you do it, especially when the neighbors see you." "Well, all I know is if I don't raise the flag, we'll lose our electricity, our car will be towed away, and eventually we will be evicted! Being a veteran of the Army, as long as the flag is red, white, and blue, I will always salute it!" "Oh, have it your own way, answered his wife, "but it's not the raising of the flag to which I object, it's you're saluting it afterward that bothers me!" What were the circumstances behind this couple's bizarre-sounding argument?
Answer: The flag on the couple’s mailbox in front of their home was painted red, white, and blue to resemble the American flag. When the husband put their outgoing bills and other mail in the mailbox, he had to raise the flag to be sure their outgoing mail would be picked up by their mail delivery person. Being a veteran and a patriotic person, he felt compelled to salute the flag each time he raised it.
A Flag for All Seasons Riddle Meme.
A Flag for All Seasons Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.
Riddle: A nurse was speaking with a young doctor just prior to their entering the room where the surgery was to take place. "You know," said the nurse, "I am surprised you are going to attempt surgery on this patient again, since you have failed in all of your previous attempts. You are lucky this patient is unable to make any complaints concerning your failed surgical attempts, and sue you for malpractice! So far, you have botched his knee, ankle, heart, and rib surgeries, and now you are going to try to remove insects from this man's stomach. What's next, brain surgery?" "After today's operation, I believe I will do just that!," replied the doctor in a defiant tone, "and this time there will be no nose bleed, or a red nose of any kind during the surgery." "That'll be the day," replied the nurse. "I will be right next to you during the operation, so when you mess up, I'll have a good laugh!" What kind of twisted, warped, medical professionals are these two? Why haven't both of them been permanently banned from practicing medicine? Just what exactly is going on here?
Answer: While on break, several of the doctors and nurses at a hospital have been competing against one another in the classic game of Operation. This doctor, although he failed at removing the patient’s water on the knee, wrenched ankle, broken heart, and spare ribs, felt confident he could remove the butterflies from the patient’s stomach without causing the patient’s nose to light up red and trigger a buzzer sound signifying failure.
Medical Misfits? Riddle Meme.
Medical Misfits? Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.
Riddle: A famous magician and his assistant were performing for a small crowd at a local mall. As part of their act, they both disappeared behind a small curtained area where they each picked up a wooden cross-shaped object. Suddenly, a small boy and girl appeared on stage in front of the audience. The magician waved his cross over the boy's head as he whispered, so only his assistant could hear him, "You are now hypnotized, and must do exactly as I tell you. I order you to strike the little girl on the top of her head." The little boy quickly complied, and the audience gasped. "I'm no hypnotist," whispered the assistant back to the magician, so only he could hear her, "but my intuition tells me the little girl is about to strike back." Sure enough, the girl kicked the little boy in the knee. The audience again gasped, as the magician simultaneously yelled, "Ouch!" At that point, the magician whispered to the assistant, "You win. Back to the script now." Was this some sick, twisted, abusive presentation, or was there some harmless explanation for these events? Just exactly what was going on here?
Answer: As part of their magic show, the magician and his assistant went behind a curtain, and each picked up a wooden cross-shaped controller, so they could manipulate their puppets for their puppet show which was part of their act. However, the magician got a bit mischievous, and used his puppet to bonk the assistant’s puppet on the head. The assistant wasn’t amused however, and not only retaliated with her girl puppet, but also kicked the magician in his knee at the same time. That was enough to make the magician return to the actual script of the puppet show.
The Magician Returns --- Again! Riddle Meme.
The Magician Returns --- Again! Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.
Riddle: Terry lives part-time in a mobile home, but it is a most unusual place. Terry's mobile home has no front or back door, so Terry can only enter his home through the roof. His home has no kitchen or basement or attic; and most importantly, his home has no bathroom! Considering all of these basic housing deficiencies, it is no wonder Terry's mental health has again come into question, as he often feels compelled to start shooting at strangers from within the confines of his mobile home. It doesn't seem possible, but the authorities are 100% supportive of Terry's actions! Has Terry snapped mentally? Is he in need of immediate psychiatric treatment, or is his mental health more normal than it appears? And why do the authorities permit Terry to shoot at others? Just what is going on here?
Answer: Terry is a soldier in the U.S. Army. He operates an armored Tank in the service of our country.
A Home Away From Home Riddle Meme.
A Home Away From Home Riddle Meme with riddle and answer link.